My guest host for this post is one of my very best friends. She is a an amazing mommy, wife and friend. Her struggle to become a mommy was tough but in the end she has 3 beautiful children. My husband and I are lucky to be godparents to one of her beautiful twins. Her family is very important to us and we love them. Missy is one of those working moms who makes everything look so easy. I constantly say to my husband " I don't know how she does it". She was nervous to host and for putting herself out there I am so proud and grateful. She is a support system for me and constantly makes me laugh.
My friend Missy!
"You've got to be kidding me!"
It's amazing how many times I have used that statement in the last 2 and 1/2 years. The first time was 6 weeks after I had an IUI at my fertility doctor. I knew I was pregnant and that something felt different from my first go around. During my ultrasound, the doctor asked me to tell him what I saw on the screen to make sure we were on the same page. I said something to the effect that I saw two things. He agreed with me and congratulated me on being pregnant with twins. That one statement was the only thing that I could get out of my mouth.
They tell you when you take fertility drugs that there is a 10% chance that you will have multiples. I thought "huh, 10% is nothing". Boy was I wrong! That is enormous when you think about how OB/GYN's still aren't happy when birth control is 99.9% effective and ladies can get pregnant .1% of the time.
So here I was...pregnant with twins while I had a 15 month old at home (You've got to be kidding me!). Time to prepare myself mentally and physically! My pregnancy was as amazing and easy as the first (sorry to anyone that offends!). No issues what so ever. At 37 weeks and 3 days, I gave birth to two beautiful babies. We didn't find out what we were going to have, but I was so sure that they were both going to be girls. The first was a girl, and then 5 minutes later they told us we had a boy (you've got to be kidding me!). Amazing!
Even when you have a baby already, you have no idea what to expect with twins. It is hard to set up a plan of attack for all that you have to do because as soon as they come home they want to change the script. Your focus is feeding, changing, and having them sleep. You HAVE to try from day one to have a schedule, the SAME schedule! Feeding them together, changing one right after the other, and putting them down at the same time. If not, you will go crazy. CRAZY!! To this day, almost 2 years later, we are still on a schedule, and I am not ashamed at how rigid we are with it. It keeps everyone on the same page and happy.
When you brave a public outing with twins, let alone all 3 kids, people look at you as if to say sorry. They make comments about how it is better you and not them or about how you have your hands full. No joke, Sherlock! Every article you look up written by a mother of twins gets into this subject, so I won't. It is a little annoying, though.
There are some things that I had to come to grips with having twins, and that is what I want to talk about. The first is that I will never be alone again. Even when I am out of the house with no kids, my brain is thinking about them and my guilt is telling me I need to get back. It's a weird feeling.
The next is that I will never sit still again. When I play with the kids I am on the floor with them, running around the house with them, getting on a sit and spin, going down a slide, chasing them, tickling them, and on and on. Even when the kids are quietly playing, there is always an ungodly amount of laundry, dishes, cleaning, etc. to do. I need to get better at letting some stuff go for a while.
The most important thing I had to realize was that someone in my house would be crying at all times (even the grown-ups!). I can't remember who bestowed that little jewel on me or if I thought it up on my own. If it was a book or a person, thank you for telling me! I feel like things have been easier due to having that mindset. If you learn how to make yourself realize that it is okay if someone is crying and that it is going to happen, then your sanity sticks around a little longer.
Two years have gone by. We are all still alive...thank the good Lord! It has been a blur and super fast, but something I wouldn't give back for anything. All of the pain, work, tears, sleepless nights, money, and loss of sanity have been worth it. I have three beautiful kids, a great husband/father, and a life that I never pictured myself having. Perfection! And then my husband asks me if I want to have another kid one day....you've got to be kidding me!