Thursday, October 3, 2013

An unwelcome visitor!

SHHHH! Quiet! Let’s get out of here before something else happens.
-Jiminy Cricket (Pinnochio)

We live in a small two bedroom condo that could be considered quaint if we weren't already busting at the seams. We thought when we put our condo on the market in March that we would have it sold and be in our new home before the baby came in June. In short we are already at max capacity and have no space for un-invited guests.

 I think any mom can tell you that those first few weeks home with your new baby are hectic and you are exhausted! Add to that your sore body and hormones and you have the makings of the perfect storm.
  With the birth of our new baby I had been sleeping on the couch with her in her bed next to me, it was easier to sleep downstairs then constantly go up and down the stairs with my sore c-section and carrying the baby. For a few weeks our living room was my bedroom, it was hard.
I was emotional, bone tired, sore body and new mommy exhausted!
I wasn't getting much sleep but what I was getting was imperative to my survival. So when I turned out the lights one night and I heard the chirp chirp chirp. I ignored it thinking it would go away.
I was wrong
I tossed and turned and couldn't sleep because of the incessant chirp chirp chirping.
Almost near tears I start to search for the chirp, I go in our basement and the chirp stops. That was easy, I must have scared it and it stopped!
Relieved, I go back up stairs to the couch, check the baby and close my eyes.
I tell you I barely made it to morning. I texted my husband and begged him to take care of the cricket.
He texted me and said. “Sorry, not sure how to”
My eye started to twitch.
I responded – “Am insane, you must kill cricket”
I googled how to kill a cricket and found that if you get some molasses and put it near where you think the cricket is, then cricket will crawl into molasses and drown.
So I sent my husband to the store for Molasses, sure that I would no longer be disturbed by the cricket!
My husband came back from the store with a Betty Crocker package of Molasses Cookies.



I wondered if my husband and I had different plans:
Me, I would like to kill the damn Cricket
 My Husband, wants me to make him cookies and possible make him feel welcome!
I told my husband that I was bordering on insane. If he doesn't kill the cricket than I was going to lose my mind!
I sent him back to Wal-mart to return the cookies and SURPRISE he managed to find liquid Molasses.
I am pretty sure his fear of me and my insane cricket ranting probably served as motivation to find the darn molasses!
Neck twitch and a CHIRP
 I finally relaxed in the knowledge that the score between me and the cricket was soon to be settled.
We filled a bowl with molasses and crossed our fingers.
Well, our cricket didn't like molasses.
Google lied.
Finally when my insanity and tears were too much, my husband went to Lowes and found spray that he knew would kill the cricket.
I didn't want him to use the spray, my overactive and exhausted mind was imagining the harmful fumes rising up and affecting the baby.
Also, during my maniacal Google search there were a lot of Chinese proverbs about killing a cricket and I was feeling a little worried that we would end up with bad luck!
What if bad luck was a family of crickets that moved in and never died? CHIRP

When I was out of the house with the girls my husband took care of the cricket and finally my house was once again quiet! Except of course for welcome noise of our girls.
No more CHIRP…

Dear Cricket,
I hated your guts and I didn't find your noises soothing. Every time I hear a cricket now my neck tightens and my eye starts twitching. 

Dear Husband,
Sorry about the cricket insanity, my fuse was short and I felt crazy. I will do better with the grocery list so that next time when I say eggs you don’t accidentally bring me a Chicken. I love you more than anything and this post was just for you. Because in the crazy aftermath of delivering a baby you get sent home with someone that looks like your wife but acts like a nut!


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